Archive for the ‘Dean Martin Roast’ Category

Grant Me Strength

December 9, 2005

Eris,

Grant me the strength to not stick a fork in the Owner’s eyeball tonight as he begins his fifteenth ‘joke’ of the night. Remind me that he is invoking the sacred Dean Martin roasts of old, and that a bad sense of humour is better than no sense of humour at all.

Although just barely.

Grant me the strength to smile tight-lipped and with clenched teeth while I pretend to be nice to the yahoos I work with. Remind me that work is work and life is life and never the two shall meet.

Grant me the strength to hold back the spicey comments I have been holding inside for the better part of two years once the liquid-personality begins to flow. Remind me that I am a Discordian and not a Dionysian.

XMas parties are the work of the devil. Get thee behind me, Santa.

Hail Eris, please Grant Me Strength.