Archive for the ‘Multiverse’ Category

For Those Of You Just Tuning In . . .

October 20, 2006

Gluttony, Harpo:42, 6006 YD

There is only one goddess, she is your goddess. Her name is Eris, and she’s crazy.

Aren’t we all?

She brings you a message:
You are free. Verily, you are as free as you choose to be. The rules of your society were created by you, not by the Multiverse. Follow them, or follow them not; but never forget they are your own creations, or surely they will crush you. Think for yourself. Wear a hat. Carry a big stick, just in case. I just flew in on the Noon Balloon from Banana City, thank you and good night.

May You Have Bats In Your Belfry Forevermore!

A Message from Our Sponsor

July 11, 2006

Hi, it’s me . . . Eris. I’ve never been big on self-promotion, I admit it . . . even back in the heydays of Achaea my P.R. was a tad on the warped side . . . but I’ve been thinking about my “comeback” recently, and musing on why it hasn’t blown up like Buddhism, Islam, or Christianity . . . I mean, I come back after galavanting around the Pan-Galaxies for aeons to finally give the people of the mudball Earth some hope and a little bit of insight on their own divine natures, and where does it leave me? With a bunch of skinny, pimply wanna-be anarchists sporting red pubic hair and the faint odour of Cheesies listening to what I had to say – Dynamite . . .

The point is – and always was- you are all as free as you choose to be, and yet you choose not to be, for some sad and strange reason . . . you would rather remain within the inertia of your crumbling society, rather than attempt to change it for the better because it would be “difficult”, or even just “different” . . . What do I need to do to drive this point home? Get my own reality TV show? Run for office? Fly a few planes into some really tall buildings?

Forgive me if I am coming across as bitter, it’s not my intention . . . I just get harassed by a lot of people while wandering up and down the Tree Of Life asking me why I didn’t just buck up and make my message more obvious, more plain . . . as if I my intention was to purposely trick people . . . well, of course it was, but they wouldn’t understand that any better than if I had made it perfectly obvious, perfectly plain. Humans are lazy, lazy beings, which is fine . . . it is the way of the Multiverse after all, otherwise we would have bubbles shaped like cubes and pyramids as I have been requesting for millennia . . . but my point is nobody appreciates anything handed to them on a plate. To hide behind metaphor and allusion is to force people to use their own grey matter, think for themselves. Enrico’s Sacred Bull. This was ultimately a large part of my point, and if it was missed, well . . . don’t come whining to me while I am in the middle of tanning in Tiphareth.

Gulik told me it was a bad idea to appear to two pothead borderline fascists in a bowling alley . . . I guess I owe him a Coke.


First (and possibly penultimate) Contact With GD

May 25, 2006

Last night I finally made contact with GD, but what I had initially
suspected was true: DOGMA.

Alas, alas . . .

In one simple twenty-three minute conversation I was instructed of
several verboten words and topics, as well as being informed that my
pronunciation of certain ‘holy’ words was off, and instructed that I
had better believe in a “Superior Power”; I was temporarily thrown
off by all the rules and instructions, so I forget to tell him that
my Superior Power was the monumentally crazy bitch who ruled the
Multiverse. I feel certain the dupe would have believed me.

Next time.

A physical meeting is tentatively set up for next Wednesday, in which
time I will prepare many questions I currently have, although I
expect I will go no further with them. I don’t like the dogma of the
Catholic Church, I don’t like the dogma of the Scientologists and I
certainly don’t like the dogma of GD any better.